In the United States, November and December provide opportunities for many to interact with families in group situations. Some of these experiences are positive, full of joy and enchantment. They rekindle our spirits and faith in noble ideals. Others of these family experiences in the waning months of the year open new wounds and refresh painful memories. These family times provide us with great opportunities to consider loss, gifts given and received, memory, and other topics easily related to leadership. In this brief lesson on leadership drawn from family experiences, let's focus on the topic of authority.

Virginia Satir, the renowned family therapist, observed that the family is the first teacher of authority relations in groups. If you attended family gatherings at Thanksgiving, and anticipate additional gatherings in December and early January, 2005, how has your family contributed to your knowledge and behavior of authority relations? For some, authority is meant to be challenged or ignored, while at the other end of the continuum, authority is meant to be revered and regarded at all costs. Our notions of authority affect our relations with leaders and contribute to personal leadership development. As you attend gatherings during the late fall and early winter, make some mental notes about authority relations in your family gatherings. There has never been a civil society without families, and they often important lessons in leadership.

As you reflect on your notes concerning authority relations, consider how these observations affect your organizational leadership. Alternatively or additionally, how do these observations contribute to the design of leadership development experiences in your organization? If you place little value in authority relations and more value in the interaction time, maybe your leadership development experiences lack in their complexity of exploring authority. If your leadership development experiences depend on approvals and judgments from superiors, maybe you've misplaced an emphasis in your experiential programming. Your actions, based on your reflections, can contribute to new pathways and development opportunities for yourself and others.

The period from Thanksgiving to New Year's Day, provides many moments for reflection and understanding of family dynamics and their place in leader and leadership development. Whether the topic is authority or some other issue, use your knowledge to construct and to explore new paradigms for leader development.

How are you "coming across" to others in your organization?

Your responses to the preceding question contain the essence of understanding your ability and effectiveness at influencing others. The ability to influence others has demonstrable effects on career progression and leadership, as it contains elements of "managing your reputation." If you truly understand how you come across to others, you have insight and opportunity to communicate effectively and to lead others. I've never heard, read, or met a leader who wasn't an effective communicator. In assessing your influence, consider five items.

1. How would others characterize your influence style? Would they say you always "pull" others together or do you "push" your ideas? When you consider the concepts of active or passive and assertive or aggressive, how do you blend these concepts into identifiable behaviors? Before getting feedback from others, consider assessing your skills through a standardized inventory.
2. Your influence style can add or detract from your interpersonal and organizational communication. Your style relates to your communication strategies, your listening skills, and to your presentation behaviors.
3. When you are presenting an approach or an idea to others, consider their reactions. If you're unsure or can't "read" these reactions, change your style completely, and observe the differences. Our ability to use "self" is essential in leadership development.
4. Consider the element of control. Getting things done with others does require self-awareness and assertiveness. Have you ever heard of the expressions "spinning out of control" or "too much in control"? If either of these resonates for you, it's time to re-consider your influence style.
5. Review your networks. If management is about planning and control, then leadership is about networking. Your network review will provide insight into the scope of your influence.

In the future, we'll offer workshops designed to assist leaders and others with developing influence. Stay tuned for our upcoming workshops.

Contouring, by definition, suggests rounding off or turning around. As the New Year approaches, many executives face the prospect of contouring existing teams. The beginning of a new year often brings new issues for membership, selection, and review. In shaping team membership, it's also useful to utilize the concept of contour as outline. Effective leaders have knowledge and experience in determining and shaping effective team contours. Several factors contribute to the development of meaningful team membership.

In developing an outline for team membership, it's essential to know where the team is headed, or in other words, to describe its vision or direction. Without direction, it's difficult to discuss roles - whether those roles are based on defined and stable environments or structures influenced by unrelenting and dynamic environments. If you want to build an organization that deepens commitment - as opposed to sowing compliance - a membership outline is vital. Vision, roles, and commitment form cornerstones to team effectiveness and open the possibilities to shared leadership roles.

Teams allow the free exercise of leadership; the exercise of leadership occurs through the leader's encouragement of authentic communication and continuous learning in service of the cornerstones identified in the preceding paragraph. The exercise of leadership can assist group functioning in its tasks and processes. I've often been surprised at how many managers expect groups to function as teams --- it's often because they haven't taken the time to understand the contours of team membership.

In shaping the contours for teams, leaders need to be clear on outcomes. For example, what specifically contributes to overall organizational effectiveness? What blocks organizational effectiveness? What is going on that either promotes or decreases group energy and enthusiasm for task achievement? Understanding team contours - and the contours for team effectiveness - can assist leaders with selecting members for contribution and for performance.

The end of the year is usually full of managerial activity; for many, the lead-up to the New Year is the busiest time of the year. Personal and professional life intersects at many avenues during this time. Leaders and managers alike are often challenged to come to terms with doing more in the New Year, with fewer resources. We're challenged to surpass prior performance. How will you end the year and what lessons does it contain for 2005?

• Catalog your activities and wishes for next year. A "list" serves practical and imaginative outcomes. If you can't identify accomplishments or describe them to others, the events probably had little organizational impact. Don't pull out your budget preparations to begin this cataloging process; the result must be a document that serves ideas related to team building and to team development.
• Remember that team development is a personal endeavor. If you haven't been on good terms with someone, acknowledge it and consider what you need to do. I'm constantly urging others to do something nice that doesn't cost any money; fee-free appreciation often yields high returns.
• Measure your development effectiveness. As you review your team or team needs, how have you considered diversity? What progress are you making so that your team reflects your organization, community, and world? Development effectiveness means that you are producing real results that make a difference.
• Think symbols and rituals. Time-honored traditions serve to build and to sustain organizational culture. Culture in turn shapes performance and behavior. As you prepare for the next year, what symbols and rituals will help to show others organizational vision and compel them to meaningful action?

2005, like earlier years, will continue to require extraordinary knowledge of self and, in turn, leadership. Leadership, for some, represents our untapped potential. Don't let another year go by without considering your behaviors that lead, motivate, and inspire others.